Top 100 Worst Movies of the 2010s: 70-61

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(Source: Slate)

70. The Book of Henry (2017) – Colin Treverrow returns to his indie roots after directing the big-budget extravaganza Jurassic World to make this film that sounds like a Lifetime Movie of the Year. The talented cast featuring Jaeden Lieberher, Jacob Tremblay, Naomi Watts, and Dean Norris can’t even save this tonal catastrophe about a genius boy’s plan to kill his neighbor for raping his stepdaughter (that’s not a spoiler, by the way). Every character makes dumb decisions and the climax left me at a loss for words, and I don’t mean it in a good way.

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(Source: Variety)

69. The Space Between Us (2017) – I have never seen a sci-fi/romance so bland, dreadful, and silly as The Space Between Us. Asa Butterfield (Hugo, Ender’s Game) plays a teenager born on Mars who falls in love with a girl (Britt Robertson, Tomorrowland) who lives on Earth. Together, he seems to enjoy this rite of passage while scientists cannot withstand it for a second. The romance is so soapy I used it to wash my hands. Gary Oldman has never been so wasted in an antagonistic role.

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(Source: ABC News)

68. Pixels (2015) – I was actually looking forward to seeing this. Adam Sandler and friends fighting off aliens in the form of retro video game characters. Sounds fun, right? Wrong!

Despite some decent action (particularly the Pac-Man sequence and the finale) and the best remix of Queen’s “We Will Rock You”, director Chris Columbus and writer Tim Herlihy suck the joy out of it with its awful attempts at laughs, terrible chemistry between the cast (especially Sandler and Michelle Monghan), and effects that would look alright if Pixels came out in the 1990s. And also, the subplot with Josh Gad’s crush on a hot video game character becomes creepy as hell. I have a theory about Sean Bean (who makes a short appearance): If he doesn’t die, the movie becomes terrible.

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(Source: The Hollywood Reporter)

67. After Earth (2013) – Remember when M. Night Shyamalan was hailed as “The Next Steven Spielberg” by Newsweek after the success of Signs? Remember when his commercial hit The Sixth Sense got nominated for Best Picture and Best Director? I was only a child when all of those occurred. 

Now heading into my 20s, this wonderful filmmaker has made some stinkers including The Happening and this mundane, monotonous sci-fi adventure, starring Will Smith and Jaden Smith. After Earth is a movie with so much potential; with Shyamalan taking half-credit for writing the screenplay from Will Smith’s story. Unfortunately, this film is underdeveloped in its science-fiction elements, so preachy in its philosophies, and so dull in its performances. Some of the dialogue (including the argument between the son and his injured father after their spacecraft crashed in a futuristic ecosystem) is nothing short of laughable. Definitely not a father-son duo to root for.

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(Source: TIME)

66. Anna Karenina (2012) – I don’t know what the hell Joe Wright was thinking of adapting the Russian novel to the silver screen. I understand why a lot of people love it, but it just didn’t do it for me. This is an overblown, convoluted melodrama that looks marvelous. Keira Knightley leads a massive British cast that don’t bring any depth into their performances. It feels like Aaron Taylor-Johnson is in a satire with his over-the-top portrayal as Anna’s lover. Also, what’s the point with the theatre stage?

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(Source: Los Angeles Times)

65. 7 Days in Entebbe (2018) – This decade brought forth some great thrillers based on real events including Bridge of Spies, Captain Phillips, and The Revenant. 7 Days in Entebbe, a film about the 1976 hijacking of four terrorists who put the crew and passengers hostage in a Ugandan warehouse. Daniel Bruhl and Rosamund Pike don’t bring anything to their performances in a film so lifeless, boring, and unintentionally funny. Also, the spiritual dancing sequences that open and close the movie could have worked better in another movie than this.

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(Source: Forbes)

64. Jane Got a Gun (2016) – Years of being in production hell, Gavin O’Connor’s lifeless Western still feels rushed and incomplete. Bullets fly, but there’s hardly any blood. The cast including Natalie Portman, Joel Edgerton, and Ewan McGregor look like they didn’t want to be involved with the project at all. No wonder why it became one of the biggest box-office flops of all-time.

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(Source: TIME)

63. Child 44 (2015)Tom Hardy is one of Hollywood’s tough guys. It’s hard not to love him in movies such as Bronson, Warrior, The Dark Knight Rises, and Mad Max: Fury Road. He has been in a few stinkers including this thankfully forgotten historical thriller about a police detective going after a serial killer preying on young boys. Also starring Gary Oldman and Noomi Rapace, the actors perform in Russian accents that are hard to take seriously. The tone shifts from historical thriller to straight-up mystery; failing on both levels. Those two-and-a-half hours feel like two-and-a-half weeks.

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(Source: IMDb)

62. Colombiana (2011) – “Never forget where you came from,” says the heroine’s uncle before his demise.

I wish I could forget seeing this action-revenge tale in theaters. 2011 already brought a terrific action-thriller called Hanna. Then, in late August, a fiasco co-written and produced by Luc Besson. Zoe Saldana is an undeniably attractive actress, but doesn’t give enough to save this unintentionally silly romp that feels anticlimactic. Thank goodness Saldana went onto star in Guardians of the Galaxy.

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(Source: The New York Times)

61. The Hangover: Part III (2013) – When one of the early scenes involves a giraffe getting its head decapitated on a highway, it’s not a good sign for the movie. There are a few good scenes; I particularly liked the thrilling scene in Caesar’s Palace. Other than that, there is not a single gag I find funny nor is there a single character to root for.

 

100-9190-81 | 80-71 | 70-6160-51 | 50-41 | 40-31 | 30-21 | 20-11 | 10-1

Top 10 Worst Movies of 2015

2015 is coming to a close. It’s about that time to recap the good and the bad movies of this year. And also what has yet to come out in 2016. 2015 has been one hell of a year for movies. As a matter of fact, there have been more surprises than last year. I’m happy I went to see what I ended up seeing this year.

But, 2015 has been known for getting more box-office disappointments than the last five years. Out of the 66 films I’ve seen, I’m going to start off with the ten movies I regret seeing in 2015. Bear with me, I haven’t seen every single bad movie. Don’t expect to see movies like Terminator: Genisys, Vacation, Jem and the Holograms or Ted 2 on this list. Without further ado, let’s start my top ten list of the worst movies of the year.

Dishonorable Mentions: Blackhat, Everest, Pixels, Poltergeist

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10. Chappie – Starting off the countdown is Neill Blomkamp’s third film after District 9 and Elysium. He gives some great ideas into this movie. Concerning how crime in a not-too-distant future. Taking place in Blomkamp’s native Johannesburg, the government agrees to create a robot police force to decrease the crime rate. For a movie with a $50 million budget, the effects are pretty good and Sharlto Copley brings the title character to life through motion capture. That doesn’t make up for what is wrong with the movie. Playing fictional versions of themselves, the popular South African rap duo Die Antwoord play two of the most annoying characters ever. It rips off many sci-fi films including Robocop, the tone is all over the place, the action is obnoxious, and the cast featuring Dev Patel and Sigourney Weaver is wasted (not to mention Hugh Jackman being absolutely painful to watch). It almost plays out like a two-hour Die Antwoord music video. Let’s hope Neill Blomkamp redeems himself when he directs the Alien prequel (if it ever gets made).

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9. Child 44 – Before he played Mad Max, Tom Hardy stars as a Russian agent in this unfocused mess. Starring alongside Gary Oldman and Noomi Rapace, the accents are distracting to the point where I couldn’t take anything seriously. The movie has no idea if it wants to be a mystery or a political thriller. Either way, Child 44 is neither thrilling nor surprising. From start to finish, it’s downright boring.

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8. The Woman in Black 2: The Angel of Death – The first Woman in Black is a solid haunted house picture featuring an eerie atmosphere and a breakthrough performance by Daniel Radcliffe. The sequel forgets everything on what the original mastered. Instead, it makes it rely on those stupid jump scares. I’m not a big horror buff, but this movie sums up on what is wrong about today’s horror movies. But I’m glad the movie didn’t have unnecessary blood and gore. I feel so bad for everyone involved especially Jeremy Irvine (War Horse).

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7. Aloha – As you could tell, 2015 had a lot of movies featuring an all-star cast. With Aloha, director Cameron Crowe presses the autopilot button from the beginning. The movie stars Bradley Cooper, Emma Stone (who plays someone who is 1/4 Hawaiian; don’t ask), Rachel McAdams, Alec Baldwin, John Krasinki, and Bill Murray. Neither of them had any chemistry whatsoever. It has no idea what it wants to be. Is it supposed to be a romantic comedy? A family drama? A subplot involving a satellite launch? What the hell is going on!? The movie is not funny, not romantic, and not surprising. Aloha? More like Good Riddance!

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6. Hot Pursuit – Boy, is this an annoying experience!? It looks like Reese Witherspoon and Sofia Vergara had a great time making the movie. But, Hot Pursuit doesn’t showcase any of their talents at all. The jokes fall flat, the writing is beyond lazy, and there is little to enjoy. I chuckled a couple times throughout the 90-minute duration. Hearing Sofia Vergara yell at the top of her lungs throughout the entire film drives me up the wall.

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5. Jupiter Ascending – When The Matrix was released in 1999, the Wachowskis brought the science fiction genre to a whole new level with its groundbreaking effects and a thought-provoking narrative. In Jupiter Ascending, one of the biggest flops of the year, they rip off every single sci-fi film in the last 40 years (Star Wars, Blade Runner, Signs, the list goes on). The decent chase scene through Chicago doesn’t save it from being a cluttered mess. Channing Tatum and Mila Kunis are both likable actors. But they manage to take their roles way too serious (their “romance” is like something out of Twilight). Don’t get me started on Eddie Redmayne’s performance as the villain. He speaks in this stupid, quiet monotone throughout the entire film, and has sudden outbursts (“I CREATE LIFE! . . . And I destroy it.” is among one of the many awful lines). I feel so bad for everyone involved.

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4. Mortdecai – Remember this movie back in January? Before tackling the part of Whitey Bulger in Black Mass, Johnny Depp plays the title character (similar to Jacques Clouseau in The Pink Panther) who tries to get his hands on a Nazi bank account. He has played the same quirky character over and over. When he overacts, it gets tiresome. The stupid action, the lame jokes, and the huge waste of talent makes Mortdecai a good place as one of the worst movies of the year.

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3. Serena – Welcome back, Bradley Cooper. After their first on-screen appearance in Silver Linings Playbook, he and Jennifer Lawrence star in a movie that it as lifeless, derivative and unintentionally funny as Serena. Filmed in 2012 and got delayed for three years, Susanne Beir gives the Depression-era setting as something pleasing to the eye. However, everything feels rushed and unfinished. With a supporting cast involving Rhys Ifans and Toby Jones, there is no chemistry between any of the characters whatsoever.

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2. Fant4stic – Everyone — including myself — was looking forward to seeing the reboot of the Fantastic Four. I couldn’t imagine a better cast to play the group of superheroes than Miles Teller, Kate Mara, Michael B. Jordan, and Jamie Bell. When I heard Josh Trank (Chronicle) directing this, I was sold. I wanted to enjoy this movie bad. After seeing what I saw, I wanted to take everything I said before seeing it back. Fant4stic is nothing but exposition. None of the four characters worked as a team (don’t get me started on the “action-filled” climax), the effects are absolutely awful; not to mention the painfully obvious green screen, Dr. Doom and the supporting characters are a bore. I don’t know if a director’s cut will make that much of a difference. But I’m glad there isn’t going to be a sequel to this pile of garbage.

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1. Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 – Kevin James is a likable talent. He is mostly remember for getting his big break on The King of Queens. However, with the unnecessary sequel to the 2009 hit (which wasn’t any good but not entirely awful), it doesn’t showcase any of his talents at all. Seriously, how can a scene involving Paul fighting an angry peacock be funny? Not a single joke works, every single character is stupid, the villains aren’t intimidating (I feel sorry for Neal McDonough–yes, “Dum Dum” Dugan–for being a part of this mess), and the action is just embarrassing to watch. Also, it feels like every Happy Madison production, starting with Grown Ups, is a vacation disguised as a movie. Why can the actors use the money to take a vacation without needing a film crew?

I hope you enjoyed what my picks of the worst movies of 2015 are. Feel free to leave a comments on what movies you regret seeing this past year. Stay tuned for my list of the best movies of 2015. Have a happy new year!

2015 Summer Movie Review: Pixels

Adam Sandler and his buddies team up to stop aliens in the form of video game characters from pixelating the world in "Pixels"

Adam Sandler and his buddies team up to stop aliens in the form of video game characters from pixelating the world in “Pixels”

How can a movie involving aliens in the form of retro video game characters such as Pac-Man, Donkey Kong, and Centipede taking over the world not get you hyped up? Pixels, the latest from Chris Columbus (Mrs. Doubtfire, Home Alone 1 & 2, Harry Potter 1 & 2, Percy Jackson: The Lightning Thief), isn’t the worst Adam Sandler movie I’ve ever seen. But it’s far from good. It feels like it takes forever to get to the action, while I’m sitting there watching Sandler doing his usual shtick. Even though it is the least offensive out of all of the movie he’s starred in, he’s just spewing out lazy-ass jokes that are intended to be funny. Almost every single joke leans toward the stale side. There are a few parts in which I chuckled (but didn’t laugh-out-loud); particularly Josh Gad. He plays the nerd who has a crush on a fictional video game character named Lady Lisa in an amusing but kind of creepy scenario. So much so he creates a flip book about the two making out. Once the action starts, it’s a lot of fun. The visuals are great, the action is clever (especially when Pac-Man takes over NYC by storm), and the ’80s soundtrack is pretty awesome. A lot of people are complaining that Pixels rips off an episode of Futurama, which I understand. If the movie came out in the early 2000s, it would actually be pretty damn good.

1.5/4

2015 Summer Movie Preview: July

Two months down. Two to go. This summer had a variety of great movies, especially Inside Out. I’ve seen it three times already and I can’t wait to see it again and again until it heads out of the theater and hit the DVD shelves. But, it’s time to talk about what has yet to come in July.

I apologize for being late doing this. I recently spent a week in Illinois mainly to see my brother graduate from NAVY boot camp (I’m very happy for him). Now I am back in Maine to give you my thoughts on several upcoming movies for the month of July. Let’s do this!

July 3

terminator-genisysTerminator: Genisys (came out July 1) – It’s awesome to see Arnold Schwarzenegger [literally] back in the spotlight. Unfortunately, it doesn’t look like it would hold up for how bland it looks. I’ve yet to see any of the original Terminator films – particularly Terminator and Terminator 2: Judgement Day – but I prefer watching those movies over this one. Nothing is creepier than seeing a CGI Arnold. James Cameron tells us that we’ll love this movie. In my opinion, it would be the exact opposite.

magic_mike_xxlMagic Mike XXL (came out July 1) – I would not be surprised if the sequel to the sleeper hit Magic Mike would make a lot of money this weekend. I’m pretty sure a lot of women will have as big of a ball as last time watching male strippers do what they do. Channing Tatum has come a long way after his horrendous performance in the G.I. Joe movies (I’m glad he got killed off early in G.I. Joe: Retaliation). This looks like it would be fun.

July 10

minionsMinions – I’m one of the few people who is not a big fan of the first Despicable Me. Other than the gorgeous animation, I found the jokes lacking and the characters dull (Steve Carell’s Hungarian accent didn’t do it for me), it didn’t make me laugh that much. And I skipped the sequel. I have to admit, the minions easily stole the show. Everyone wished for a spin-off featuring these delightful characters. Guess what? Their wishes came true! I don’t think this highly anticipated spin-off/prequel to Despicable Me looks any great, but it looks pretty damn funny. Not to mention the three main characters remind me so much of Moe, Larry and Curly (“The Three Stooges”). It’s interesting to see Sandra Bullock portraying a villainess.

the-gallowsThe Gallows – The found-footage horror genre enters an empty high school at night. An evil has lurked after a freak accident occurred during a play. A group of students go around to investigate. The previews look like it’s pretty atmospheric (given that it’s R-rated because of it, which is super rare). I have a bad feeling this would turn out to be garbage. We’ll play it by ear.

selflessSelf/Less – This looks like a massive step-up for Tarsem Singh after his visually stunning but narratively lackluster Mirror Mirror (that movie can suck it): a futuristic sci-fi thriller. It involves a wealthy businessman who has cancer and decides to go under a procedure that changes his appearance to make him look younger. But this procedure is not what it appears to be. I like a good sci-fi. Let’s hope this delivers.

boulevardBoulevard – After his death last year, it’s hard not to choke up watching a movie starring Robin Williams. He has been under the spotlight for more than 40 years improvising, doing stand-up routines, making people laugh, and delivering serious performances. He even won an Oscar for his astounding role in Good Will Hunting. Being his last acting role, Boulevard seems to be a great send-off for Williams. People have been praising his performance! I cannot wait!

July 17

ant-manAnt-Man – Marvel is in its third phase in their cinematic universe. Funnyman Paul Rudd stars in a more serious role as the titular role who wears a suit that has the power to make him shrink into ant-size. I like the looks of this movie, but I’m curious how Edgar Wright would have played it out before Peyton Reed entered the director’s chair. The effects look reminiscent to Honey, I Shrunk the Kids. It might be as entertaining as the other superhero movies.TrainwreckTrainwreck – A comedy that has been getting unanimous praise prior to its release. And I could definitely see why. Directed by Judd Apatow (The 40-Year-Old Virgin, Knocked Up, Funny People, This is 40), starring two funny people (Amy Schumer and Bill Hader), and countless celebrity cameos. Also, the jokes – from the preview ­­­­– made me laugh quite a bit.mr_holmesMr. Holmes – Played by countless actors including Robert Downey Jr., Benedict Cumberbatch and Jonny Lee Miller, Sherlock Holmes is one of the most popular detectives of all-time. This year, director Bill Condon makes a version of Holmes unlike anything we’ve ever seen before. He’s played by Sir Ian McKellen. At the age of 93, he goes around England to investigate one final mystery. I would be a fool missing this one out.irrational-manIrrational Man – We all know how much we hate Woody Allen as a person. But more than half of the movies he makes – including Annie Hall and Blue Jasmine – are some of the best movies ever made. His new movie follows a professor who goes through an existential crisis who bonds with one of his fellow students. I like Joaquin Phoenix and Emma Stone (star of last year’s decent but charming Magic in the Moonlight), but this looks like a standard entry in Woody Allen’s repertoire.

July 24paper-townsPaper Towns – Based on the book by John Green (author of The Fault in our Stars, which became a massively successful adaptation last year), Paper Towns follows a love story turned into a mystery. This is mainly a mystery for teens and young adults. Nat Wolff (star of The Fault in our Stars) and Cara Develegne look like they had great chemistry in what seems to be a funny and mysterious film. Hell, this looks better than The Fault in our Stars. Cannot wait for this and Looking for Alaska (I’ll have plenty of time to read that).pixelsPixels – It’s rare for anyone to look forward to a movie starring Adam Sandler. I personally liked his stuff on Saturday Night Live and some of his movies (Billy Madison, Happy Gilmore, Funny People). Other than that, I hate Adam Sandler with a passion. I’m glad he worked with a better director this time; Chris Columbus (Home Alone, Home Alone 2: Lost in New York, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone, Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets) alongside Kevin James, Josh Gad, Peter Dinklage, among others. How can a movie involving aliens in the form of retro video game characters taking over the world not get you stoked? This is one of the most ridiculously entertaining concepts I’ve ever heard for a movie!southpawSouthpaw – As I like to call it: “Raging Bull for the new generation”. Jake Gyllenhaal got huge for the role of a heavyweight boxer fighting for his life to get custody of his child. It looks like Antoine Fuqua (Training Day, Olympus Has Fallen, The Equalizer) has made an emotionally tense character study.the-vatican-tapesThe Vatican Tapes – This sounds so much like a direct-to-DVD crap-fest. Mark Neveldine, who directed Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance, cannot direct to save a life. I can’t imagine anyone watching his movies and not get a headache. The camera would not even stand still! Here’s some advice: MOUNT THE CAMERA ON A TRIPOD, FOR GOD’S SAKE!

July 31vacationVacation (in theaters July 29) – I rather watch the original 1983 Vacation starring Chevy Chase over this pile of tripe. Even Chris Hemsworth’s awkwardness doesn’t make it any funnier.mission-impossible-rogue-nation

Mission: Impossible – Rogue Nation – Ethan Hunt is one of the best action movie heroes and Mission: Impossible is one of my favorite movie franchises. Even Mission: Impossible 2 is a guilty pleasure of mine. He and his short hair are back to go on another globe-trotting mission. It amazes how no other actor can pull off perilous stunts like Tom Cruise. Yes, he was actually hanging on that cargo airplane door. Looking for a good time. Let’s hope Christopher McQuarrie steps up after directing Jack Reacher.the-end-of-the-tourThe End of the Tour – A hit at this year’s Sundance, this movie follows a journalist interviewing a writer for the Rolling Stone. This showcases Jesse Eisenberg and Jason Segel in what seems to be the performances of their careers. I love movies like these where they only involve people talking rather than mindless explosions.

Recap:
Most Anticipated: Boulevard, The End of the Tour, Mission: Impossible – Rogue Nation, Mr. Holmes, Paper Towns, Pixels
Least Anticipated: Terminator: Genisys, Vacation, The Vatican Tapes

I hope you all enjoyed what my thoughts on upcoming movies for July are. Please feel free to leave comments on what you are looking forward to this July. Stay tuned at the end of this month as I give my thoughts on what has yet to come in the month of August. Take care.